Friendship with the Enemy - The Big Bad Sujatha

After listening to the promises Pak made, my world had - all of a sudden – changed for the better. The next couple of weeks were spent smiling, instead of frowning about what a fuck all project I had ended up in.

Before I narrate what happened at the end of those “couple of weeks” – let me narrate what all stuff happened during those weeks, and a couple of events from the previous weeks.


Samesh Balluri had started this little movement called “Know the PespiCo account”. Basically, what he wanted was for everyone in the different projects in the account, to know what else was going on in the other teams. This would help people share their knowledge and also move to teams or projects of their interest. To cut a long story short, it was PR (public relations) ploy which was in effect a waste of everyone’s time – or atleast I felt so!

Just to give you a foreword, Samesh was very talented at fooling PespiCo people into giving Diapro huge contracts. But, hey, that was his job, and all I can say was that he was way too good at it! And thanks to his talents, there were one too many projects in the account. But, like all the overachievers, he was a victim to his own success. His success at getting a lot of projects had raised the expectation bar from his managers/seniors. And this had resulted in him trying to iron out every possible dollar for PespiCo folks in terms of getting new and new projects.

So, now, he was at this juncture where he was not able to get any more projects. That’s when the whole idea of “Know the PespiCo account” came into his head. This way, more people get to know about the different projects in the account and thereby, are able to identify which are the potential areas where we could get more business/projects. In short, Samesh employed the “Two heads are better than one!” concept on a larger scale. All this wrapped in a PR ploy. How much more shrewd can one get!

Samesh – Hats off to you mate!


So, now to the part that I hate. How Samesh planed to conduct these “Know the PespiCo account” sessions was by getting everyone in the team to stay back on Thursday’s (the meeting’s were scheduled to occur between 6.30 PM to 8 PM ) and getting people in the corresponding project to talk about their roles and the business scenarios they catered to. Kind of reminded me of my “Seminar” presentation back in college!

Now, I might be foolish enough to have fallen for his PR trick. But, even that was not going to be enough to convince me to stay after 6 pm. On asking around, I was told that if I bunked one-too-many sessions, Samesh would not be very happy, and this would show in terms of a messed up hike.
Working at Diapro instills a few things in you. And one of them is ***Not*** to expect anything in terms of monetary returns – be it hikes, or even salary for that matter. But, given that I was taking home around 9K odd bucks, the thought of pleasing Samesh and taking home that that extra 2 or 3 % (to be read as another 200 or 300 rupees) seemed romantic enough to convince me to stay for those brain fuck meetings.

Most of these meetings didn’t last more than 30 to 45 mins. But, if I were to wait for the company provided travel – I’d have to wait till 8.30 PM. But, personally speaking, I am not a very patient guy. And ergo, on Thursday’s I generally commute by my bike. This helps me get home as soon as the dumb meetings got over.

Oh … And no description of the meeting would be complete without mentioning what I used to do at these meetings. Heck, not just me – every there used to do the same thing – “Switch your brains off and Sleep with your eyes open!” Seriously, I mean it. For people who can’t fathom how to sleep with your eyes open – try enrolling yourselves for Engineering College. 4 years of listening to stupid old lecturers talking about stuff neither they, nor anyone else in the class, cared about can do wonders in terms of teaching you such wanton skills. Trust me – by year # 3 – it becomes second nature to any engineering student!


Ok … Back to the main story!


So … One of those weeks, my roomies had gone home for something. And staying alone is just not something I am very fond off. So, to kill time and beat boredom, I had decided to stay the week with my aunt.

By now, we were well into the second month of the stupid PR drill that Samesh had envisaged. On one of those Thursday’s, the meeting got extended beyond 8.30 PM. Supposedly, the person at onsite was completely “involved” in the presentation and didn’t notice that we had overshot the stipulated time frame. But, trust me when I say, everyone else in the room – except ofcourse the managers and ofcourse Samesh Balluri himself – were irritated to the core at the idiot at onsite going on and on and on about how great his project was and how we could get more business by offering certain “extra modules” to the existing application.
To be honest – in my mind, I had already killed the onsite bugger by running him over by a Paandi lorry!!! (@#$@#%$#@$#$@#$@#)


But, to cut a long story short, since the managers were still there – we had no choice but to stay back.

At the end of the meeting – which by the way wrapped up at around 8.50 PM – everyone had missed the last Diapro shuttle, and the only way out was to wait till 10 PM – because that’s when they could take the company provided Cab service.

Thankfully for me, I had my bike. Translated it meant – unlike the losers who’d have to wait till 10 o clock, I’d be leaving right now.
Just as I was about to leave, Sujatha raps me on the shoulders and asks

Suj: “Aren’t you staying at Kodambakkam”
Me: “I stay at Guindy. But this week, I’m staying with at my aunts’ place at Kodambakkam.”
Suj: “Oh … Ok … You’ve got a bike right?
Me: “Yeah …”
Suj: “Are you heading home now?”
Me: “You bet I am …”
Suj: “Oh good … Then can you give me a lift please?”

This was the first time I had heard Sujatha speak so nicely to me. And just for that reason I said “Yes”

Suj: “Great … you get your bike and wait by the main gate. I’ll just get my stuff and come.”
Me: “Fine … Just don’t delay it. I’m not too fond of waiting.”

That said - I headed over to the canteen for a quick snack. And yes – I knew that if Suj did indeed rush to her place get her stuff and head to the main gate, she’d end up having to wait for me. “Serves her right!!! After all – she had not been very nice to me over the last 3 – 4 months. Let her wait for some time!!!” was what was going through my mind.

But, after a nice and relaxed snack, I got my bike and headed over to the main gate – No Sujatha. “What the fuck??? Where is she??? Maybe she left! I should probably call her to confirm that. Then, I can leave without spoiling the relationship even more!”

So, I pick up the phone and dial her number.


Me: “Sujatha. I’m at the main gate. Where are you?”
Suj: “Oh … I’m so sorry … I had to send out a couple of e-mails. I’ll just come out in 5 minutes! Please do wait?”

What the heck … I had spent a good 15 mins at the canteen just to tick her off. And it turns off – the little rascal had completely forgotten that I was “probably” waiting for her at the main gate. Heck – I think she was trying to tick me off!!!

But, since she didn’t know that I had not been waiting for her for the last 15 minutes’, I decided to use it to my advantage!
(Sly me eh!!!)


Me: “What??? I told you I am not very fond of waiting. I’ve been waiting for the last 15 minutes now. Please – just come right now! You can send your mails in the morning!”
Suj: “Sorry … But these are important client mails. I have to send them before I leave. Just give me 5 more minutes’ man!
Me: “Can’t you hitch a ride with someone else?”
Suj: “Ok … Ok … I’m done … I’m coming … Just need to grab my stuff!”
Me: “Oh … Whatever!!!”

I still had to wait another 5 minutes before she came out. My guess is that, she told me that she’s heading out and then continued with her e-mail. Grrrrrrrrrrr … I felt like a total looooooooooooooser!!!

Moving on …


When Suj finally did come, it was a really weird sight. Let me take a moment of your imagination to describe how it looked. Ever seen people selling plastic wares (door to door sales i.e.)? They’re the ones who generally carry stuff in both hands, another big basket on their head and yet another basket on their shoulder.

What I was seeing was pretty much the same minus the head load. Seriously, on her shoulders - she was carrying this huuuuuuuuuuge black purse of hers. One hand clung on to a huuuuuuuuuuuuge lunch bag. Another bag was clutching on similarly huge linen bag.

At this sight – I was left wondering – “Why in the world did I say - yes … I’ll give you a ride!!!”

But, that’s not the end of it. Let me describe Sujatha’s stature. She’s about 5.2”. My bike was about 4 feet high. As you can guess – she’d probably need a ladder to climb on to that – especially with that much load. So, guess what – I ended up having to hold on to her luggage – then help her onto the bike.

Sujatha – like a champ – was sitting at the farthest possible spot on the bike. For those who ride 2 wheelers with a pillion, I’m sure you’ll understand that making you pillion sit away from you is inviting disaster. For those who don’t know – the farther you sit from the rider, the more unstable your bike becomes (Centre of Gravity concept).

And thanks to Sujatha’s stature – I had a bad feeling that my bike was just about to perform a wheelie. For the uneducated – a wheelie is when a 2 wheeler drives on just one wheel. In layman’s terms – my bike’s rear end was so bloody overloaded that it was about to flip backside!!!

The only way to resolve it was to ask her to move closer to the center of the seat.

Me: “Could you move a little closer to me?”
Suj: “Why? I’m comfortable here!”

I hope you’ll all understand when I say – I was thinking - “I’m comfortable here!! You little idiot … I have a good mind to push you off the bike and just leave! No girl has ever gotten on my bike … Why did I have to start by giving this bitch a ride!!!”

Me: “Sujatha. If you don’t move closer to the center, it becomes very difficult to drive as the bike is very unstable when pillion sits far off from the rider!”
Suj: “Fine …”

With this she moves an inch closer. I thought she doesn’t have enough space to move closer and that my backpack could be the possible culprit.

Me: “Hey … Do you want me to remove my backpack so that you can be more comfortable?”
Suj: “No … Why’d you want to do that. I’m comfortable as I am. Please just drive!”

With this statement – she placed her big fat purse between us. The reaction that evoked was what made me realize that she probably smelt a rat. Now, I not only had a hurt ego, but also a big fat ladies purse poking into my spine!

I’d lost interest in arguing with her. I was too tired and fed up to fight. So, I just started the engine and teed off.

To be honest, for the first 10 minutes of the drive, I was just thinking to myself – “How the hell did she think I was trying to hit on her … Worse – take advantage of her riding with me!”
Finally, to soothe my ego – It ended up as “I have better tastes you know … I’m not that fucking desperate!!!”

But, justice be done, I wouldn’t blame Suj for thinking like that. After all, I was a renowned flirt in the account. And she had every right to misinterpret my goodwill gestures!

Anyways … A few minutes into the drive, I tried to make small talk. You know – the regular stuff. What do you do over weekends, your interests, etc, etc, etc … Initially she was hesitant in talking, but a little prod here and a little coaxing there ended up opening Suj up. By the end of the drive, she was talking freely and even laughing – Now that’s something I never saw coming.
:D

So, finally, as we came close to Kodambakkam, I asked her

Me: “Where’s your house? I’ll drop you there.”
Suj: “That’s okay … Just drop me off at the corner near the Supermarket. I’ll walk home from there!”

Maybe I hated her guts. But, it was around 9.30 by the time we got to Kodambakkam. And the chivalry and gentlemanliness in me didn’t allow me to drop her at some place where I wasn’t 101% sure about her safety. I mean … I just wouldn’t be able to forgive myself if something had happened to anyone I’d just given a lift – just because I was lazy to not drop them off at their door steps which was probably a few hundred meters away!

Me: “Sujatha … I am not very comfortable leaving you at such a place and that too at this time of the day. If you don’t mind, I’ll leave you at your flat itself.”
Suj: “It’s okay … Really!!!”

Thanks to the event earlier on, I somehow thought that she didn’t trust me and that why she didn’t want to tell me where exactly she lived. Maybe she thought I was a stalker or something!
:(


Me: “Please … I insist … I won’t even ask for coffee!!!”
Suj: “Well … In that case … If you’re ok with it – take the next left!”

A couple of left and rights, and we finally reached her flat. I, obviously, had to help her get off the bike as well.

Me: “Goodnight … See you at work!”
Suj: “Why don’t you come up? My mom makes the best coffee!”
Me: (with a smile) “I promised I won’t ask for coffee! Maybe next time”
Suj: “Ha ha ha … Ok then … See you tomorrow!”
Me: “Bye then …”

And I zipped away to my aunts’ place.


After that night, the way Sujatha started behaving with me changed drastically. She no longer gave me a shmuck look. Where there used to be a look of disgust, there was always a smile.

I guess my act of chivalry made her realize and feel that I’m not all that bad after all. From that point, my friendship with Sujatha grew leaps and bounds. And today – she’s my best friend, as I am hers!

:)


Suj … Thanks for being there for me during all those crisis moments!!!

(Ok … Before I get ultra mushy and start crying, I better move on to the next chapters!)